Opportunities
by xxliveforever17xx
Summary: Sam is left to his thoughts regarding his relationship with Andy in the aftermath of the undercover operation. Post-finale. Please review!
1. Chapter 1

_Hey guys. This was written in five minutes out of horrific pain from the finale. I cannot believe she stayed with Luke. I cannot believe she didn't tell Sam how she felt. I CANNOT BELIEVE IT!_

_ Anyways, hope you enjoy it. Please review, even though it's a bit depressing. Poor Sam...I am so sad for him right now, it's not even funny. Their just characters though...I have to keep reminding myself that._

_This will be a two-shot, with Andy's POV next. Stupid girl. So, so stupid. This will be the first of many, many fics for the last two episodes. Enjoy! xx  
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_"See, you don't have to fake it anymore."_

He had given her an opportunity. Hell, he had given her many opportunities. Opportunities to tell him how she felt. Opportunities to _show_ him how she felt.

Because he knew that deep down inside, Andy McNally had feelings for him. He had seen it in her glances, heard it in her speech, felt it in her touch.

Or maybe it just had been wishful thinking. Maybe he loved her so much, he imagined she loved him too. Because watching her with _him_, smiling and talking, he realized that it was Callaghan she loved, not him. It had always been Callaghan. It had never been him.

He had given her an opportunity. She had thought he had been killed. If the situation had been reversed, he knew that he would have told her how he felt, how he _really_ felt, regardless of her relationship with Callaghan.

But there had been nothing, no hug, not even a friendly touch on the arm. She had kept her distance, even though she thought he had died.

He threw the beer bottle against the door, too angry to finish drinking.

Her lack of contact had only solidified his heartbreak. He had given her an opportunity, and she hadn't taken it. She had made her choice.

And it was Luke Callaghan.

The thought tore him in half. He felt like his heart had been ripped out, and Andy McNally was stabbing it repeatedly. It was like he was clawing for air, but couldn't make his lungs work.

He almost wished he had been shot, almost wished he had been the one dead at the scene, because death had to be better than the excruciating, horrifying, blinding pain he was in now.

And maybe if he had died, she would have finally admitted to herself that he was the one for her.

But no...no, he couldn't think that anymore. Because even if she was the one for him, which she was, he wasn't the one for her. He never would be.

But then again, when they had been undercover, and she had been talking about _knowing_ he was the one, and how she couldn't resist...

He told himself it had just been acting, just a good undercover cop doing her job. But there was no way she could have faked that. Because when he had kissed her, he had shown her that he loved her, and always would, even if something happened to them that night. And the way she had touched his cheek, and leaned her forehead against his, and held his hand - had to mean something. Had to meant she _felt_ something.

Right?

He didn't know what to do. Could he go on living day after day with the knowledge that he would only ever be her friend?

Yes, because even now, after all she had put him through, he couldn't imagine a life without her.

He was in love with Andy McNally. He would always be in love with Andy McNally. He would never be happy with someone else.

He would die a brokenhearted man, because Andy was the one for him. And he would wait for her, even if it was forever.

He would keep giving her opportunities, because he loved her.

If only she loved him.

If only.


	2. Chapter 2

_Here's the final installment. It's a bit short, but I felt I couldn't write the same amount I had done with Sam's part, because Andy was so emotionally stunted in the last scene. I really wanted to peel back her seeming disinterest and the way she didn't seem to care for Sam at all, to show how she really felt, and hopefully I did that somewhat with this._

_Writing this, I started to feel bad for Andy, though I still think she's an idiot.  
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_Anyways, hope you all enjoy! xx

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_"See, you don't have to fake it anymore."_

Andy knew truer words had never rang more hollow in her ears.

Maybe Dov had been right when he had jokingly told her she was emotionally retarded_, _because after she had seen Sam alive and well, the first thought that had entered her mind_, _after unbelievable relief and indescribable joy, was the knowledge that she couldn't do what she wanted to do to him that very moment, because her _boyfriend _was standing fifteen feet away.

So even though all she had wanted to do was hug him and stay in his arms until her residual panic and fear vanished, she refrained from touching him in every way, because she knew that once she started, she wouldn't be able to stop. And because an embrace would lead to a kiss. And a kiss would lead to a confession. A confession of everything she felt towards him. A confession of love.

His words had been an opportunity for her to stop faking it. An opportunity to stop faking her relationship with Luke; an opportunity to stop faking her friends-only shit with Sam.

But she found she couldn't stop faking it. She had been pretending for so long that the thought of being honest for the first time scared her senseless.

The truth was, she had given him opportunities too. She had given him many opportunities to tell her how he felt, but he hadn't taken them.

But it was the opportunity she had just missed that broke her heart.

She twirled the bottle of alcohol absentmindedly in her hands, sitting alone, because Luke had volunteered, a little too eagerly, to help Boyd tie up the loose ends of the operation, even though she had just been through hell. She couldn't help thinking that Sam would never do something like that to her.

When she had been pretending to be Edie, and had said all those things about Gabe, she had been drawing off of her own feelings towards Sam. Like she had said, he was it for her, he was the one.

She had done a lot of things she wasn't proud of, things she wished she had never done, things she wished she could take back.

But the one thing she regretted the most was the opportunity she had just refused to take.

It was her biggest mistake of all.


End file.
